On the ground, we wai, they chant

There have been many days of preparation: food, dress, location, monks. Our friends, Saowalak and Jeff, are already married on paper, but are taking the opportunity to have a dual ceremony with us to make it complete.

Thai tradition is to have the bridal couple blessed by Buddhist monks, and then to hold the wedding. Before modern reception halls and western influence, the ceremony would be held at the home of either the bride or the groom. Saowalak's sister offers her home in Pathum Thani ("lotus city"), half an hour out of Bangkok, to us. That's where we are today, and it's almost time.

"They're here!" Saowalak's young nephew yells in Thai. Nine monks climb out of the back of a pickup truck and walk in the door, single file, a cloud of orange.

To begin the blessing, we light incense at a mini-shrine set up near the door, and then sit down on our heels in front of them and wai (hands in a prayer position). The nine monks, seated on pillows in a line along the wall, begin chanting verses from sacred Buddhist texts. They show no emotion and seem to be entranced by their own chanting. The first monk holds a roll of white thread and puts it between his thumb and forefinger and wais. He passes the roll to the next monk, who passes it to the next, until it is in between the wais of all the monks. When this is complete, the eldest monk drips wax from a burning candle into a golden urn filled with holy water as the others continue to chant.

We wai and bow in front of each of the 9 monks so they can each bless us with the holy water. They do this by dipping a bamboo brush into the urn and shaking it on top of our bowed heads. We are soaked by the 9th. The chanting, which has been going on for about 20 minutes now, stops. The monks wai.

From a golden tray, we give each of the monks a gift of orchids, incense, candles and money. Our hosts told us earlier that although monks aren't supposed to own cash, they appreciate it anyway.

The orange-clad and serene monks hold up big fans in their right hands, which are decorated with images of the buddha and verses in Thai. They start their second session of chanting while we pour blessed water from a small metal dish into a bowl and wai to all of them. This session lasts approximately 25 minutes.

It is time for the monks to eat. Geoff and I give each monk a plate, each of us holding it with both hands. Each plate receives a serving of rice. The monks sit in the middle of the floor in a circle, adding fish and vegetables to their plates. We are told to go upstairs and relax while they are eating.

When they are finished, we come back down. There is a final chant, which ends with the eldest monk chants a line by himself. They pick up their fans and gifts and quietly leave. We have been blessed in the eyes of the Buddha. Traditionally, Geoff and I would leave to have our marriage legally registered by the city.

Saowalak's family removes the pillows and rugs and places big, woven bamboo mats on the floor. A big pot of rice is placed on each mat and little plates of food and intricately designed vegetables are placed around it. Each person is given a plate, fork and spoon and told to eat. I am hungry and it is 'aroi' (delicious).

An hour later, it is time for our wedding ceremony to begin. Geoff and I sit on the floor, and two pillows are placed in front of us. We are given a small silver tray with 8-inch pieces of the same white string from our blessing laid on top in a criss-cross design. Our guests, only those older than us, sit down in couples on the other side of the pillows. We hand them the small tray, from which they each take a piece of string. Our arms are outstretched on the pillows, which they rub three times with the string and then tie to make a bracelet. While they are doing the tying, they wish happiness, good fortune, or many kids out loud for us, and then switch places and do it again. We are to wear the bracelets until they fall off.

When all of the bracelets have been tied, we wai and bow three times to the shrine until our noses touch the ground, and then sit on low, cushioned stools. In front of us are low, cushioned tables, for us to stretch our arms out on for more well-wishing. Our Master of Ceremonies garlands us with a long string of flowers and ribbon and a ring of unspun thread is put on each of our heads, connected by a longer thread. We are to keep this with us forever because it is symbolic of our bond of love. He then puts white paste on each of our foreheads; two horizontal, and above them, two vertical dots.

From the golden urn, a conch shell is filled with water. This part of the ceremony is called rod nam sang. Translated, it means 'soak water conch shell'. Each guest older than us pours water from the conch on our wai-ed hands while wishing more good fortune and children on us. When they are finished, we give them small gifts to help them remember this day.

Our ceremony is complete. We pose for many, many, many, many photos. We open up bottles of beer and our guests toast to us, "chai yo!" (cheers). Traditionally, the eldest happily-married couple would go upstairs to lay in our wedding bed to "warm it " for us (Geoff thinks this means they will have sex in our bed). Since it's not time for bed yet, we let them off the hook and make more toasts to our future.

To read about our 4th wedding ceremony, click here.